The following transcript is taken from Facebook. It is a brief conversation via Private Message between a child and grandad. The grandad and his wife have shunned this child’s parents for at least two years. This has had more of a negative impact than even the grandfather can imagine. The child’s response is heartbreaking.
Grandad:
Hey, Sylvia*. I know we have not been a part of your life the last few years. But come by and see us sometime. Papa and Mama.
– May 29 at 10:57pm
17 Year Old Grandchild:
Really? You message me after two years and suddenly want me in your lives, without even attempting to talk to my dad first!?
My parents are not keeping me away from you. I could have come over whenever I wanted. I CHOOSE to stay away.
I find it disturbing that you undermined my dad by not talking to him before you messaged me and I find it odd that you messaged me on Facebook instead of calling. Our phone numbers have never changed.
I’m really not sure how I feel about you anymore. I don’t know if I ever want to talk to you again. I don’t know if I could ever trust you. All I know is that you messaged me and now I have all of these questions and emotions going through my mind.
Honestly, I’m afraid to be around you for the simple fact that every time I allow you into my life it eventually becomes horribly negative.
You’ve banned my mother from a house that didn’t even belong to you more than once. You literally tore the entire family apart by not allowing them to spend time with great-grandpa on their own terms before his death. Then, immediately after he died – and you had legal authority – you banned everyone and didn’t allow any of us to properly grieve.
You’ve hurt my parents over and over and you’ve made life so that I don’t trust you. And no one in the family wants to be around you.
YOU have decided to miss SO much of my life. You have NEVER been there for me when I’ve wanted or needed your support. Even when I’ve begged and literally been in tears because you refused to be a part of my life. I’ve been hurt too many times. I’m SCARED to be around my own grandparents. Do you honestly think all of that can just go away and we’ll ever have a healthy relationship? I don’t know.
My life improves when you’re not in it and I have some amazing things headed my way. I just don’t think it’s worth it to allow your negativity and drama back into my life.I want to be able to trust you but I know I can’t.
Truth is I really miss you guys. Truth is I would like to see you but I’m probably not going to because I know it’s better for myself and my family if we stay away.
The only way I would ever consider wanting to be around you again is if I knew you were BOTH getting psychological help, we were all welcome and we had some sort of guarantee the past wouldn’t repeat itself. Even then, it would be extremely – maybe even impossibly – difficult for us to set aside all that history again.
– May 30 at 4:29pm
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