Now That's What I Call Nonsense 5

If Tony Morris wrote the Day’s Text

Tony Morris became clearly exasperated at parents calling Watchtower out over graphic scenes of violence in Bible dramas. His defence was to insist that, as inspired scripture, it was entirely legitimate to portray these scenes. 

Tony Morris has now written two daily texts with no holds barred. 

Sunday, May 8

There she lusted after her lovers, whose genitals were like those of donkeys and whose emission was like that of horses. – Ezekiel 23:20.

Jehovah’s creation is beyond criticism. We rejoice in all the animal kingdom has to offer and all its delights.

Therefore if when out with a sister on the ministry she exclaims “Look at the dong on that donkey!” we would do well to question how we feel about this. We should view it as a sincere compliment, after all a small willy would clearly be the product of Satan. (1 Peter 5:8). 

As for the emissions part of the scripture, it would serve all witnesses of the true God to realise, that although inspired by Jehovah himself, some of the writers were complete perverts.

 

Monday, May 9

Your temples behind your veil are like the halves of a pomegranate. Your neck is like the tower of David, built with elegance ; on it hang a thousand shields, all of them shields of warriors. Your two breasts are like two fawns, like twin fawns of a gazelle that browse among the lilies. – Song of Solomon 7:3-13.

We all know a sister or two who wears undergarments which lifts, separates and keeps her ears warm. We have several here at the Bethel home. For example, sister Fletcher – a long time servant of Jehovah – can rest her plate on her chest while she eats. 

With our bible-trained conscience, we can rise above unclean thoughts, but does that mean ignoring them completely?

No. Solomon shows that provided a sister’s buffers are compared to fruit and wild animals, we can turn smut into poetry. 

A donkey.

 

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Grant Davis

A former member of Jehovah's Witness. Now a professional writer.

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